--Roethke "The Wakening"
ALL antipsychotics can cause Tardive Dyskinesia
--Even the new, "safer" ones.
The only antipsychotic shown that has a low risk of Dyskinesia is Clozapine.
Here is a list of common antipsychotics:
Amisulpiride (Solian)
Aripiprazole (Abilify) "New" and "safer"?
Clozapine(Clozaril)
Olanzapine (Zyprexa)
Quetiapine(Seroquel)
Risperidone (Risperdal)
Zotepine (Zoleptil)
Chrlorpromazine (Largactil)
Flupenthixol (Depixol, Flupenthixol,Fluanxol)
Fluphenazine (Moditen)
Haloperidol (Serenace, Haldol) -- This is what got me.
Loxapine (Loxapac)
Pericyazine (Neulactil)
Perphenazine (Fentazine)
Pimozide (Orap)
Prochlorperazine(Stemetil)
Promazine
Sulpiride (Sulpitil, Sulpor)
Thoridazine (Melleril)
Trifluoperazine (Stelazine)
Zuclopenthixol (Clopixol)
© Megan Snider
Hello Megan.
ReplyDeleteThanks again for the work and thought you put into your posts. It is rewarding to share information and thoughts with you. I have felt, at times, like an abusive parent for putting my son through all of the various treatments he's endured for both kidney failure AND mental illness. I am on guard with his Abilify.
Reading your posts gives me some needed perspective on what things are like in his world. While it's a fact that we he and I both struggle with depression (don't you love that cliche? "struggle with depression"... snort!)... anyway, while we both have that diagnosis, I grew up with a healthy physical body, an intact family (for the most part), and your run-of-the-mill kind of kid problems, whereas he has had a multitude of traumas. I try to be sensitive with him, but I know there are times when I say something that he interprets as totally ignorant on my part.
You've reiterated in a few posts and comments about that inability to talk yourself out of those negative thinking patterns, being driven by fear and anxiety. I get that. I really do, because I fall into that hole myself when the storms of life get too much. (And, dammit! There are always storms out there somewhere!) But as a parent, I yammer on to my son (in a helpful tone) about the positives and the hopefulness of life, trying to boost him in his dark moments, and occasionally I lose patience when he's inconsolable... You'd think that living with the black dog (as Churchill called it) myself, I'd know how to deal more sensitively with it with my kid. But I don't. Lacking the tools.
haha! Don't we depressive types give great pep talks!! I will find a positive quote for tomorrow. Or at least a good joke. (Did you hear about the sheep farmer? He didn't know how many sheep he had because every time he tried to count them, he fell asleep.)
yours in lame departures,
ananji
Ha ha. Yeah. Well, if he's on Artane or something similar, he's probably ok. The antipsychotics helped me, but it's a shame what happened. I don't want to end up in a retirement home some day with permanent damage like that. It can happen, but it may not. I don't have the stats on it. Sometimes I still have weird muscle pain and unsteady hands, but that's about it.
ReplyDeleteWhen I start to cry for no reason, my loved ones just tell people I'm tired. That may be true; I may be tired-- but that's not why I'm crying. A lot of people think it's hormonal with women and it's really not. It's psychological. But it's amusing how people see a woman crying and jump on the "hysteria" ban wagon.
I find myself giving pep talks, too to people and in my own mind, I would never, ever say that to myself. There's actually a video you can watch, which I actually should post, that simulates Paranoid Schizophrenia and I find it terrifying. Anyway, various voices are talking to you as you walk around and they're saying negative things like, "Kill yourself;" "You're worthless;" "Do_____". I found that interesting because I don't hear voices, but I feel the same absolute negativity.
In the fifties theories on mental health blamed the parents, but they have been debunked. Mostly they blame the mother-- it's called the Refrigerator Mother Theory (the mother was supposedly cold) and was applied to kids with Schizophrenia and Autism.
They are not true.
Frankly, from my point of veiw, I know my family is trying to help, but, since I believe the negative thoughts I have, I often defend them in arguement. I don't want them to be true, but I feel like I should say, "But, I know they are."
You shouldn't say you lack the tools because, as I've stated here, a professional can't seem to save me-- he even put me into convulsions-- so, to that degree, EVERYONE lacks the tools. I lack the tools to help myself. Franz Kafka once said that there seemed to be some magical string drawing him along through life and if it were not for that, then he would have died. I can certainly understand that.
I forgot to say that anything done in the name of saving someone is not misattributed torture-- a lot of time painful procedures are necessary. Surgeries are painful, but necesary. I really don't think you subjected your son to torture-- I seek my own treatment and it tortures me-- but I do it in the name of saving myself.
ReplyDeleteI was born a premie baby and my mom often wonders if the procedures they put me through as a child didn't begin my Panic Disorder. She said as a baby I would go stiff and act like I didn't know where I was. I recall my first experience with panic attacks-- it was just a simple strange though: "What if I'm not real?"-- and, from there, I spiraled down. In my teens I showed symptoms but stayed positive. As an adult, I have become absolutely hopeless and I am sure that I have some sort of mood disorder.
Bipolar and Schizophrenia are related and I believe that my therapist can't tell which one I have because "feelings of unreality" may be Schzophrenia as well as an extreme reaction to extreme fear.
Part of the reason I suffered tardive dyskensia was because he put me on a high dose of Haldol-- which is a COMMON Schizophrenia medicine. They dope up Schizophrenics so badly on Haldol that they drool and tic like crazy simply because they don't know what else to do with them.
The problem is that Antipsychotics are used for both Schizophrenia and Bipolar (including Schizoaffective and other boredline disorders). So, the pills are quite strong. Haldol is quite an old drug, too-- and Abilify may be reformed.
Nonetheless, I just wanted to warn everyone.
And I don't think you should blame yourself. I doubt your son blames you either. Most of us just want help. And most of the arguements with my parents have been not about US but about mental illness and what to do about it and what it is-- not about the fact that I blame them.
Heredity may play a part-- but heredity influences a lot of things.
So, please, I'm telling you; don't blame yourself.
And, I'm hoping, someday things will get better for all of us. Because I don't hate my parents, but I hate this quality of life. I know you know what I mean, because you suffer yourself. Maybe you believe you have hurt your son and this idea has been taken over by fear and agression underneath Depression. I know I certainly torture myself as well. Mental illness is pretty good at making us hurt ourselves.